While writing this article, I had titled it: “Please if you wouldn’t mind, can we talk about you but not about me?” because that pretty much sums up the entire article you’re about to read. I’m not talking about the classical attitude of storytellers or talebearers, who are always eager to hear the latest on people and turn around to publish it from the rooftops. No, I rather want to tell you something about people that genuinely care so much about others.

I don’t know if you’ve observed this: the people who care most for others could be those who need care even more. Many times, they tend to hide their needs but would go to any length to know the needs of others and meet them. Once you ask for ways to reciprocate, they’ll simply respond with a warm smile, “don’t worry, I’m fine.”

The Shunamite Woman and Elisha

In 2 Kings 4: 8-37, we are told of this wealthy woman with a beautiful heart. She had observed Elisha pass by her street a few times, and so one of the days, as Elisha was passing along the street of her house, she asked him to come in to eat something. She must have been a generous lady seeing that she wasn’t doing the favour because she knew who Elisha was.

She just saw a simple man and extended her care towards him. After that day, she asked Elisha to constantly visit her house whenever he came around her city. That was the beginning of a fruitful symbiotic relationship.

With time, she observed that Elisha was “a holy man,” who had some assignments to run around the city. “Instead of allowing this holy man to go back to his base each day, why not clean up one of my many chambers for him, maybe put a bed, a table, a stool and a candlestick inside. This way, he can rest for the night and leave for his home during the day,’’ she thought to herself. Later she spoke to her husband, and they both agreed to reserve a room for Elisha.

Now, as long as Elisha just stayed in his room, ate and slept, there was no problem. He could ask how she was doing and maybe tell her and the husband how his day went. He could ask for more rice, beans, yam or more meat in his egusi soup. If the bed, table or stool needed repairs, she was ever ready to take care of it. If the candlestick is spent, she had a rich stock for replacement. I mean, Elisha could demand anything, and she’ll make it available – she was wealthy, and most importantly, very cheerful.

But the moment Elisha began to ask for ways to reciprocate the favour shown to him, the woman smilingly answered, “don’t worry. I’m fine. I have all I need. There’s no problem at all.” She didn’t want to entertain any talks about her needs. She wanted to give but not receive, not necessarily because she hadn’t any needs but because she doesn’t want to discuss them. She wanted to help a prophet but still denied how much spiritual influence the prophet wielded. There was no faith anymore that her needs could be met.

It took Elisha’s servant Gehazi to detect that she hadn’t any child. But for her to say it out to the prophet? No way. She didn’t want that part of her life exposed to anyone, not even to a holy man who had the power of God to perform miracles. 

First Thoughts

Sometimes, the people that care so much about others are the ones who aren’t willing to talk about their personal needs. They love to help others but not to talk about their own issues. They might even be so ashamed of their lacks that they feel vulnerable to let you into their privacy. They’ve given up; they’ve lost faith that anything about them can change.

They feel extremely vulnerable sharing their weaknesses because although they believe that God can use them to bless others and help others out of their weaknesses, they don’t think that God can help them out of theirs. “Our wants and needs have come to stay,” they say in their secrets, “but those of others can be solved.” So, outwardly, they always appear fine, but they’re drying inwards.

Naaman, the Captain of the host of Syria, and Elisha the prophet

Naaman was an army general, a person in authority that commanded several soldiers. The fact that he was referred to as a great man, honourable and a mighty man of valour in 2 kings 5 shows that his leprosy wasn’t an impediment at all for him. He led his troupes to victory in their wars by God’s hand. So, the king of Syria undoubtedly loved him, and his soldiers were loyal to him. But he was leprose.

When Naaman’s maid asked him to go to meet Elisha for healing, the apparent arrogance of Naaman was an attempt to mask his unwillingness to show his vulnerability. Yes, he might have been faithless. Yes, he was also arrogant. But behind his hot-under-the-collar behaviour when asked to go wash in the River Jordan seven times is the man trying so hard not to show his weakness – his leprosy, a disease he was so ashamed of.

He was willing to help Syria win the war; he was willing to serve his king; but he doesn’t want anyone to bring up any talks concerning his disease, his weakness, his pains.

Final Thoughts

You see, some of the people who you see around always willing to help others succeed are battling with failures in their personal lives. It may not be failures in that same area, but there’s certainly an area they need God’s touch. These people are willing to go the extra mile to see others happy, comfortable, fulfilled and nourished, but they could be dying inside.

They go home happy when others are happy and are sad when others are sad. They’re burden carriers on behalf of others but unwilling to allow others to carry their own burdens. They want others to be open and relaxed with them, but they don’t want to be open to anyone except God. They feel ashamed to talk about their deepest needs and desires.

Here is me asking, please allow others to help you. Allow others into that space. Not everyone, of course, but someone, maybe some people. You’ve helped us many times, kindly allow us to help you one time. You’ve fed us, given us a hut to sleep in, covered us with your love, nourished us with your delicacies. Now, please tell us: what do you want us to do for you? Do we speak to the king? Maybe you need a child? Do you need the healing of your leprosy? Please allow us to help you. You’ve done enough already. Let’s ask God to meet you at the point of your needs. Thank you. 🙂

“Keep on loving one another as brothers and sisters. Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it. Continue to remember those in prison as if you were together with them in prison, and those who are mistreated as if you yourselves were suffering.” – Hebrews 13:1-3

Thanks for reading. Please share this article if you found it helpful. God willing, I shall see you tomorrow with another dose of inspiration. Have a lovely day and God bless you.